Area Pops Suddenly Develop Political Opinions

Recent reports suggest that pops from the Cul’thar Republic have suddenly developed diverse opinions on political matters.

Cul’thari pops had previously been broadly apolitical, however on the tenth anniversary of the young space-nation discovering FTL travel, vast swathes of society rapidly divided into bitterly opposed factions.

A leader of one the newly formed xenophilic factions, Veldanura, explained to Xenonion: “When I went to sleep last night all I was thinking about was breakfast, but when I woke up my mind was racing with thoughts about pan-galactic trade and the ethical implications of space militarism.”

At the time of writing, seven Cul’thari factions have emerged, each pushing for individual agendas such as expanding foreign diplomatic relations, or enslaving anything that moves.

Image: A number of political factions have emerged in Cul’thari society.

According to insider reports, the Cul’thari government were caught completely off guard after discovering almost 1.3 trillion pops had suddenly developed opinions, having previously enjoyed absolute political unity in a single-minded Senate.

Livestreams from inside the legislature showed dramatic pictures of Senators initially placidly agreeing with each other on a new xeno refugee policy, before half the body erupted into a blind rage, with both some government and opposition members calling for the immediate purging of anyone who disagreed with them.

Urging an end to political strife, Cul’thari president Kashnaka made a public address earlier today, stating: “So, does anyone know what just happened? My last election was a unanimous victory but now I have something called an ‘approval rating’, and it’s dropped below 20%. I don’t know what that means, but I don’t like it and want it higher. Perhaps it’s something to do with all the policies that we introduced over the last ten years that everyone now seems to have issue with. However, even I admit I’m starting to disagree with policies I personally implemented.”

Health experts have highlighted concerns about the longer term effects of opinions on Cul’thari pops. The Public Institute for Space Health (PISH) has confirmed it is investigating whether opinions could be classified as infectious, and whether if left untreated, may cause serious harm.

Similarly, political analysts expect opinions will have a highly fraught impact on the Republic’s upcoming election, which for the first time ever is likely to feature more than one candidate for pops to vote for.

ANALYSIS -- AN'TAK

How this change will influence Cul'thuri politics is yet to be seen. If predictions are accurate, the emergence of 'opinions' and factions represents a paradigm shift in how the Cul'thari government will be able to operate. As one government official told me, leaders may have to partake in novel practices like "compromising" and "discussing both sides of the issue." Could opinions spread to your area? Is your family safe from inevitable political dinner table arguments? Only time will tell...

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Federation Member Proposes War It Definitely Wont Participate In

The Just Alliance federation is considering a declaration of war request from the Uri Nation, a member state which has absolutely no plans to assist in the war effort.

Presenting its proposal to its four fellow federation members, the Bwauki Multisystem, Glukkonian Guild, Eredi Assembly and presiding Lorex League, the Uri Nation appealed for military intervention against its larger neighbour, the Cevanti Empire.

Image: Members of the Just Alliance meet at the 12,391st Tri-Weekly Summit on Loraxia Prime. From L-R; President Scree of the Bwauki Empire, Executive S’Lig of the Glukkonian Guild, President Ur’Ine of the Uri Nation, Matriarch Lyssa of the Lorax League, and Chancellor Fillur of the Eredi Assembly.

Uri diplomats highlighted the urgent need for intervention against the Cevanti’s ill treatment of slave pops, while also adding that the transfer of several resource-rich border systems to Uri control would be “an extra bonus.”

“This war is vitally important for furthering the interests of the Uri Nation and… er, of course, the whole Just Alliance.” Uri leader Ur’Ine told Xenonion. “Those poor slave pops, toiling away on all that precious Betharian stone. They must be rescued. Of course, if there’s room for the slave pops they should be taken too.”

Image: President Ur’Ine of the Uri Nation, dressed in traditional Uri gold.

Despite having the second largest fleet power in the Just Alliance, behind the Lorax League, the Uri Nation has categorically ruled out participating in any conflict.

Ur’Ine reportedly told fellow leaders that the Lorax fleets would be much more efficient in battle as Uri fleets were only specialized for “just sitting parked above space ports, looking pretty.”

The Lorax League has approached the request warily, and insider reports suggest there may not be appetite among leadership to get embroiled in a costly war.

Such public disputes between two allies is unusual, and perhaps a sign of increasing strain within the federation. The Just Alliance is only just recovering from months of turmoil after the Thelmar Union was kicked from the group last year after blocking another war request 363 times for no apparent reason. This followed on from the rocky initiation of the Bwauki into the federation, who still consistently refuse to wear clothes at meetings.

Early reports indicate the Uri proposal is likely to pass and in preparation, Lorax admirals have begun frantically clicking ‘encourage allied fleets to follow’ call signs in a vague hope this will stir the Uri into action.

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Notification Spam Prompts Area Pacifists to Consider Becoming Fanatical Purifiers

Scyldari leadership is tonight considering completely ditching the space nation’s longstanding ethos of pacifism and xenophilia in favor of becoming fanatical purifiers, after having received a record-breaking 3.7 trillion inane diplomatic notifications in the last 24 hours.

The outward-looking Scyldari have historically had high levels of contact with other species from across the galaxy, and as such they have often fielded a substantial number of diplomatic notifications.

However, recent reports from the Scyldari Foreign Office indicate both diplomats and computer systems alike are struggling to cope with an increasing flurry of notifications as hundreds of space-nations simultaneously expand and interact with each other.

Image: Scyldari Foreign Office computers are struggling to cope with high levels of inane diplomatic notifications.

“At first these notifications were important, like, FYI the hegemonic imperialists next door have declared war on you,” Scyldari diplomat Cali J’Bassim told Xenonion. “But now we’re getting hundreds of notifications every minute, about stuff that’s not even relevant to us. Half the time I can’t even work out if we’re at war or not.”

Image: Cali J’Bassim, Scyldari Diplomat.

The Scyldari Foreign office highlights that over the last three months it has been fielding an average of 1.2 trillion diplomatic notifications per day.

Common messages include:

• Borders opened

• That species you interacted once with has entered a research agreement with that other species that look a bit funny

• Borders closed

• Two space nations have formed a laughably small federation

• Borders opened again, but then quickly closed

• The laughably small federation has given some irrelevant species association status

With no option to filter or mute messages, the Scyldari Foreign Office has had to employ 233 million Scyldari pops to manually sift through notifications until an automated system can be implemented.

The Scyldari Prosperity Faction estimates that the cost of employing the entire population of Scyldaria as interns and terraforming the planet into a Foreign Office ecumenopolis will cripple the space nation’s budget by 2260. As such, leaders are now seriously considering switching to xenophobic and militaristic ethos in a bid to quell the diplomatic spam.

Scyldari president Dackam addressed the issue in a press conference earlier today, stating: “We cannot stem the tide of these notifications. As such, we must address the root of the problem. We must destroy their very source… the other xenos.”

Image: Scyldari president Dackam.

His speech was met with universal approval across Scyldari society, and indeed from most other space nations who are grappling with similar problems.

However, the proposed switch from polar opposite ethos would be unprecedented in modern space history. In his closing remarks at the press conference, Dackam acknowledged this, stating; “I guess first we just need to figure out how to actually switch ethos. Anyone?”

Shares in Colossus-grade weapons on the Space Exchange Index (SEXI) rose dramatically on the news.

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Inward Perfectionists Inwardly Perfect, Bored

Renewing their Peace Festivals edict commemorating 75 years of stability, Tokaa Commonwealth leadership have reportedly begun to wonder if there’s anything more to ruling a space-nation.

The isolated xenophobic republic’s constitution forbids engaging in diplomacy with alien empires, cutting it off form the labyrinthine negotiations and cutthroat politics of the galactic stage.

Image: Tokaa Prime, an agrarian idyll world

Similarly, getting approval for an offensive war is largely impossible because it requires a major change in Tokaa policy that would upset the nation’s various factions and risk lowering pop approval below 100%.

As a result, the government’s main role is to deal with internal matters, such as maintaining the economy and infrastructure. However, that requires relatively little effort, leaving leaders with nothing to do most of the time.

“The most exciting thing I got to do this term was sign off on a round of infrastructure upgrades after waiting several months to get enough minerals,” First Speaker Fang Sha told i. “Everyone in the Commonwealth is living in utopian abundance, but I just feel empty inside. Sometimes I wish I was out there, crusading against fanatic purifiers or forming federations.”

Image: First Speaker Fang Sha longs for “just a little chaos" to “spice things up a bit.”

All types of Tokaa leaders say they feel the same. Due to the extended period of peace, the Commonwealth’s admirals and generals have not seen any action within their lifetimes. They are stuck at level one, parking their fleets and armies in orbit around their home star. In a way, they are cursed by their own success – their navy is powerful enough to deter any potential invaders.

In addition, other empires have closed their borders to the Tokaa in retaliation to their closed borders policy, and as a result Tokaa scientists are unable to explore the galaxy outside their borders.

Chang Suli, a Tokaa scientist with the Carefree trait told Xenonion, “Our species just wanted to be left alone in peace, but we didn’t realize it would be… so boring.”

Rates of zro substance misuse on the planet have reportedly shot up in recent events, with local Enforcers celebrating now they have something to do.

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Lone Strike Craft Destroys Colossus After Five Year Slog

The Voor Technocracy has been left reeling after its flagship Colossus-class planet cracker, the Quietus, was destroyed by a lone strike craft from the Keth Cooperative.

It is thought the Keth victory may break a deadlock in the 53 year-long border war between the two neighbouring space-nations which has engulfed the mid-Rim.

The tiny strike craft, Salmon One, was piloted by Keth native Luuk Skalvåker, who is now being hailed as a hero across the cluster.

Image: The Voor colossus.

It appears however the attack on the Colossus was entirely opportunistic, as the Salmon One had accidentally got left behind its carrier ship when the Keth fleet retreated from a failed incursion of Voor space. While Skalvåker was piloting home through enemy territory, he stumbled across the idle Quietus in the Scheat System.

The Colossus had only been constructed 1 year earlier by the Voor Technocracy at a huge cost. It had just completed a trial-run of planet cracking in Voor Space before it was to be set upon Keth core worlds.

Skalvåker, automatically set to aggressive stance, engaged the much larger Colossus with no choice in the matter. For five long years he vigorously attacked the gargantuan ship before eventually causing its weapon system to fail and explode, killing all ten thousand crew on board.

Image: Luuk Skalvåker

“My strategy was… well I didn’t have a strategy.” Skalvåker spoke of the attack to local news on returning home. “Wearing down the armor was a slow process though, I just barely exceeded it’s monthly hull regeneration. It was a long five years, let me tell you.”

Voor leadership has come under heavy criticism for both the loss of its flagship weapon, and as to why the Quietus was left undefended for such a protracted period of time.

Emperor Daft Fader of the Voor Technocracy has declined to comment on the incident.

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Pacifist Empire Elects S875.1 Warform as New Leader

The Skrell Empire has sworn in its first non-organic leader, the S875.1 Warform, who has pledged to be a ‘Champion of the People.’

The technocratic Skrell leadership caste elected the S875.1 by a clear majority, as Representative Knellnar told Xenonion: “It’s the best leadership candidate we’ve had in years.”

The materialist and pacifist-inclined Skrell discovered the Warform over 30 years ago when a science expedition in the Outer Rim happened upon the abandoned Corvette it was stored in.

Upon reactivation of the ship the S875.1 pledged its service, and it’s 400-power Corvette, to the Skrell navy.

Unfortunately due to design incompatibility, the ship was unable to be integrated into any Skrell fleets. As such the S875.1 was tasked with the solo mission of destroying a nearby Scavenger leviathan. Unexpectedly, the ship was lost and the S875.1 was thought to have perished.

Unknown to Skrell leadership however, while the physical hull of the S875.1 Warform had been destroyed, the bot commanding it had managed to successfully return to the pool of admirals awaiting further duty, where it remained unnoticed for 25 years until suddenly being elected today.

Little is known about the background of the S875.1, or its vision for the future of the Skrell Empire, but this has not deterred officials like Knellnar, who continued; “The S875.1 Warform shows us that being a semi-intelligent machine designed only for warfare should not stop one from aspiring to the highest position of power in a pacifistic technocracy, and becoming loved by the entire nation on the way."

On being asked as to whether she was worried about the S875.1 seeking retribution for being sent alone on such a risky mission, Knellnar laughed; “no… truly, none of us could have ever predicted such an adverse outcome…”

The S875.1 has thus far declined to comment on its election, opting instead to beep quietly, and somewhat menacingly, in a dark corner of the Skrell Congress building.

*inspired by idea from Dr. D.R.

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